Twenty Five Part 3 (last one I promise!)

Hello!!

Lilli here.. back with points three and four, based on the things I’ve learnt and are learning as I experience everyday life in my current state of joblessness, slight confusion and generally feeling like a blog of goo.

Last time I talked about how Life is just a process; we shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves nor each other if we haven’t yet figured out what direction we want to take for everybody peaks at different times.

I also brought in the somewhat touchy subject of social media. Don’t let what you see define you nor the person you aim to be; aim for authenticity.

Moving on………

Number 3: Stop Complaining!

I swear If my boyfriend had a dollar for every time I opened my mouth to complain and whine about how my life is sooo horrible and people suck and my phone is broken (it actually is) and blah blah blah, I think he would have been on his way to becoming a millionaire.

Complaining is nice; it makes us feel good after venting and going on a rant and letting it all out.

However…..

After complaining, then what? What are you going to do about it? 

Yes I am jobless, I am broke, and people suck (not my wonderful readers), yes my almost new phone is broken and it’s going to cost me a lot of money to get it fixed…

So what? 

What I am trying to say here is: after you whine and list a million reasons why your life isn’t going anywhere; don’t just sit there, do something about it!

And I am not only talking about this current situation myself and some of you out there are in, no. I am talking about all of the problems and situations you face that you find yourself complaining about; even the things you cannot change (don’t go too deep on this one and start thinking cancer or lost limbs). 

Maya Angelou once said if you do not like something, change it or change your attitude.

I am jobless yes but I refuse to sit here and not try to remedy this situation. I apply for jobs; check my email every day for job opportunities. 

I am not sure what I am supposed to be doing or where I am supposed to go in life; okay great! Here I am, talking to my internet friends using this blog. I am not famous yet neither am I the best writer, but I am very happy doing this for it keeps me active, motivated and inspired as I wait for the job I know I am going to get.

You cannot sit there complaining about something and not try to change it. And if you do not want to change it, change your attitude and be positive since you won’t do anything anyway.

It is hard, I admit but it must be done.

Number 4: Love Yourself, Appreciate your Now!

Amidst the misery, doom and gloom that is somewhat my life these days, I have realized just how important self-love and gratitude are.

I did not really like myself.

 I felt that people like me are the kind that attract the misery,doom and gloom like a magnet. My job made me feel like a ‘somebody’ so imagine how I felt when that was taken away from me. 

I felt like a blob of goo. 

I still do…sometimes …especially when that darn PMS hits.

Lately, I’ve realized that with that kind of mindset, no matter how successful I may become, I’d never really go anywhere.

Never really have a voice.

Always fade into the background.

So

Love yourself.

When you feel unimportant, lost, confused, ugly, unattractive, talentless, hopeless and worst of all, useless. 

We were created whole and pure; powerful and not lacking anything. Do not take that away from yourself by feeding your mind with negativity. 

Learn to love yourself at your best and your worst.

As for Appreciating your now…

Often times we find ourselves coveting someone else’s life thinking that it is better than ours. 

Perhaps it could be.

However, that does not make us less of a human being.

We are all running different races towards different goals and destinations.

We may not even know what those goals and destinations are but that is A-Okay. Appreciate what you have now for it is part of your story. 

Besides, it could be worse… I mean look at the world without your rose tinted glasses and you will definitely realize you kind of have it much, much better.

And easier.

I know I do.
Are you on your own journey? What hurdles are you facing and how are you dealing with them? Share your stories by leaving me a comment in the comment section.

Don’t forget to like and share this post. Plus if you think I’m cool enough to follow, do the needful!

Cheers,

Lilli 😀 

P.S Never ever ever stop trying; it’s a bad season, not a bad life.

Twenty Five Part 2

“Not all those who wander are lost.” J.R.R Tolkien

Not all those who wander…are lost.

Not all those who wander…are lost.

The day I heard that quote, meditated on it and allowed it to sink in was the day I had my epiphany; just because I don’t seem to have it all together, doesn’t mean I don’t.

Just because certain individuals seem to have it all figured out and are on the right track, the verge of greatness, the edge of glory (oh Instagram, you devil you); does not mean they do, does not mean they are.

What am I trying to say? 

Below I have a couple of things, amongst many, that I have come to realize about life especially when one feels lost and very confused.

Number 1: Life is a Process!!

We go on living our daily lives thinking that the people around us who seem to be at the top of their game and have reached their peak, have everything in order. And then there’s us; the one’s life has left behind. The one’s meant to wander around like headless chickens.

No.

That is a very wrong way of thinking; the kind that needs to be thrown into a blazing fire or get trampled over by a herd of elephants.

No human being on earth can raise their right hand and claim that they have it all together; they have mastered the process of life. Those who look like they do seem so because you are looking at them from an outsider’s point of view, behind the scenes. Believe me they also have their days where they just feel like throwing their arms up in the air and collapsing on the sofa. The one’s you see flashing their diamond engagement rings on Instagram, yet they don’t have an actual job. The ones that invite you to their wedding, yet they haven’t done their masters programme. That 18 year old that invented the cure for cancer but has social anxiety.
Not all of us peak at the same time, some of us are just late bloomers.

Vera Wang started her amazing fashion designing career at 40….40!! 

Henry Ford created his revolutionary Model T car at the age of 45.

J.K Rowling was flat on her face before Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Stone was published; her marriage had fallen apart, she wrote bits and pieces of the book on napkins. I am sure she felt lost. Thirty two rolled in, she had her novel published, now she is a legend.

Ellarie, 31, is a YouTube beauty guru and single mother. She was home and very jobless for about two years even after getting her masters. She was lost. She took to Youtube, uploaded her first video on YouTube in 2014. Ellarie now has a YouTube following of about 335,000 and 1.2 million followers on Instagram. 

In conclusion…….

Not knowing where I shall be is scary BUT it is also exciting. Wandering about does not mean I am lost, I may look lost to you…I may even seem lost to myself. 

But

I am simply on the road to discovery. I am part of a grand design in the tapestry of life no matter how miniscule I may think my role is. 

So are you.

Number 2: It’s just Instagram!

Seriously, it’s just Instagram.

People are so busy parading their lives for all to see, admire, lust after and bask in their amazing-ness. 

I personally find the whole thing to be very silly.

We are living in a very superficial world where people don’t feel good if they do not post a picture of them at that great party; which they did not like.

At that great job; which they absolutely cannot stand.

Of that great boyfriend; who has never claimed them.

Don’t get me wrong; post away. There are some people who actually post on social media not to seek validation from people but to simply share a bit of their lives. The kind that actually have what they share (not pretend like that Peruvian weave they own is theirs when they actually borrowed it from a friend’s head). 

The kind that does not aim for perfection but imperfection; the rare kind (kudos to you).

I am now teaching myself (Aha!) and learning to take all these things I see on social media with a grain of salt; some of it is real, some of it is not. I have also unfollowed the people that were feeding my insecurity and making me feel ‘not enough”. 

Try it.

After all, it’s just Instagram, let’s not take it too seriously.

Do you feel lost? Have you ever felt lost? Share your own experiences by leaving me a comment down below. Next time we shall discuss points three and four.
Don’t forget to do the needful: Share, like, follow!

Cheers,

Lilli 😀 

Twenty Five.

“All that is gold does not glitter. Not all those who wander, are lost.” J.R.R Tolkien (Lord of the Rings).

Have you ever felt so lost, so confused, so boggled with life at a time when you are supposed to have it at least a tiny bit figured out? Well, that is so me right now.

Hello. My name is Lilli and I am also very lost, very confused, very broke and jobless…very very jobless.

I also happen to have recently turned 25.

25.

The year I was supposed to be close to my wedding day, close to achieving my goals, close to finishing my masters….close to so many big things. But I am so far from all of those things I don’t even bother envisioning them.

It sucks going through social media and by social media I mean the ever popular Instagram; the site that gives liberty and freedom to those who want people to admire, envy and lust after their amazing life. Everyone parades the highlights of their day; yes day because apparently, for some people, every day is worth ‘highlighting’. As I was saying, it does suck a tad going through Instagram and seeing all these amazing strangers living their amazing lives…some of them aren’t strangers at all.

Just last week, a girl I was at university with, just got engaged to some guy she has only been dating for two seconds and of course she had to post it on Instagram to rub it in our faces….I mean have us share her happiness.

People my age are busy populating the planet, developing apps, writing novels, travelling the world, taking risks, getting married (which also qualifies as a risk if you ask me), getting their masters and their PhD’s …so many things! And then there is me; the girl who has had her license for 3 good years but finds the act of driving a vehicle to be very daunting and life-threatening.

Honestly speaking, I seriously did not think that at 25, I would be where I am…lost, confused and boggled with life.

However, I had an epiphany some days ago…A Eureka- A_HA! Moment…

Pass through very soon and I shall tell what I realized. Believe me if you are going through what I am going through right now, this will come in handy. It may not be Instagram – worthy, not worth tweeting or Tumblering (these social media apps though) BUT it will save you from a life full of misery wondering why that girl who used to give it all to those many boys is getting married and has that amazing job and not you.

Don’t forget to follow, comment and share your thoughts below.

Cheers!!!

Lilli  😀